There would hardly be any person on this earth who would hate kids. Even the toughest of men cannot resist the soft touch of small hands and sweet innocent babblings. The heart immediately melts away by just hearing the first cry or just seeing a sweet innocent smile on a child’s face. Intrinsically a child cannot be good or bad, evil or angel, but they are made to be one. The onus lies with both parents and society to allow a child to pursue his/her dreams. Though the kids on the spectrum are a bit difficult to handle than their mainstream counterparts, they are not in any way impossible to tackle. Sometimes, or we can say almost every time, it gets difficult for parents to handle their little ones on the spectrum. However, their children would always remain their first priority and responsibility. Here are certain points our so-called civilized society needs to understand in order to get another perspective to autism.
Make their childhood beautiful to brighten up the country’s future
1. Love is what they need – Each child has a very svelte heart that only understands the language of love… unconditional love. Thoughts such as ‘why can’t you’ and ‘if you would just’ don’t fit into their minds and to put it in a simple way, they don’t like to be reminded about it every now and then. Autism does not happen with a choice, it just happens and can happen to anyone. It can be your child or anyone else’s. The only thing we can do is to accept it the way it comes, instead of making much ado about nothing. All they need is support, guidance, and understanding that can help them grow and lead an independent. The mantra of patience, patience, and patience should be learnt by all of us to allow these little ones become a part of our society. It is very important to see an autistic child as being differently abled, rather than disabled. People with autism are capable of perfectly executing selective tasks that are beyond the imagination of people like us. Why to only look at their limitations, when there are so many strengths to appreciate? They may not be good at making conversations or making an eye contact, but they do not even cheat at games, pass their judgment, and lie to others as so-called ‘civilized’ people like us do. All they need is a person on whom they can rely; who can be their mentor; and love them the way they are.
2. Help them to build and focus on what they can do rather than telling them what they can’t – Just like any other individual, children on the spectrum also do not like to sit and learn in an environment where they are constantly reminded that they have some limitations and mental blocks that need fixing. Instead of taking these criticisms as a challenge, they just give up as they are not mentally prepared to fight for something of which they are getting constantly criticized for. The easy solution for this situation is to look for their strengths and encourage them to indulge in positive activities.
3. All you need to listen and understand their ways of communication – Please understand that savant children are unable to express what they feel. Put simply, it is quite difficult for them to say what exactly they want. So it is important to understand their body language, signs of agitation and withdrawal, in order to make out their state of mind at a given moment. You have to be alert for every move they make. Echolalia is what ‘normal’ people say when referring to imitative behavior of kids on the spectrum, but for children on the spectrum, it’s just difficult to come up with a prompt and exact response they want to give.
4. Try to differentiate between ‘I choose not to’ and ‘I am not able to’ – It is not that kids on the spectrum do not listen to instructions; it is just that they are unable to understand what we say. If we call them across the room, they can only listen to their names, but they cannot understand the purpose behind the call. For that it is necessary to stand in front of them and make them understand what we exactly want them to do.
5. Don’t forget, they are children – It is very important to understand that autism is just a part of a child, not all of who he/she is. Take for example, a human being is filled with emotions, feelings, ideas, talents, dreams, and preferences. Being fat, uncoordinated, and myopic do not make you who you are as you are more than just that, right? Being so-called normal, we can have control over defining ourselves. We can even single out one characteristic to make that known to the world, but as children and that too with special needs, they are still unfolding things that can take a long time. No one is aware of what these children are capable of, so instead of belittling them and abandoning them from the society, try to be human with them with a soft and humanitarian feel for them.
Love them, adore them, and make them laugh as these are the beautiful gifts one can give to children on the spectrum. They might not say ‘Thank you’ like a civilized person does, but all they can give you is blessing and return you the love unconditionally. Isn’t that enough?
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